I Have 15 Pairs of Jeans!


I thoroughly cleaned my room this week and became concerned about the number of jeans I own.

I accumulated them throughout the past few years after purchasing them from stores. That’s usually how obtaining clothes works- unless you get hand-me-downs [which some of my pairs might actually be] One or two pairs of the jeans are too big for me to wear [from my post study-abroad days when I returned a couple pounds heavier, if you know what I mean]. I think the light colored pair may be from my early years in highschool [I have been graduated from college for a year now]. I feel bad getting rid of things sometimes. But sometimes, I love disposing my own things!

I told my mom the other day, “This is the first year I will not be getting ready to go back to school”. It was such an interesting thought. She immediately informed me, “You’ve been graduated for a year,  you didn’t go back to school last year either.”

“Ohh”, I thought. “That’s true”, I said to her. I miss getting ready to go back to school. I miss having a pile of stuff in the living room waiting to be loaded into the car. I miss driving up to Fairfield University [in Connecticut] and having time to listen to and memorize lyrics to rap songs. Sometimes when I’m bored in the car and driving alone, I rewind parts of songs over and over until I memorize lyrics. How do you think I know the lyrics to Kanye’s “Golddigger” or T.I. feat Rhianna’s “Live Your Life”.

It’s quite amazing how the human mind has such a great ability to memorize lyrics. Kids know lyrics. Adults know lyrics. The elderly know lyrics. My grandma, who is in the 90th years of her life, can’t always get words out to talk to me [because of some mini strokes within the past few years], but flip on the switch to her CD player, and she’s singing the words to Rosemary Clooney’s “What’ll I do”. [I had to google the person who sang that song]. Maybe teachers should instruct lesson plans to song. [Take note Emily [my sister is a grade-school teacher]]

Emily, this is how you should start your class this year. Firstly, dress in a white button up shirt tucked into a longgg skirt that goes down to your ankles. Have the kids walk in. Let them sit down. Do not say a word to them until they are all quiet. Walk to the front center of the room with your hands cupping one another in front of your body with a very straight posture. Smile. Then begin by singing this song [with an emphazied British accent [even though I know you can’t hear British people’s accents when they sing [like the Spice girls…crazy]]]:

“Hello Class. My name is Miss ______. I come from New York. I have a one small dog.”
Smile again, tipping your hat.
At this point, you should be sitting with your skirt spread out on the floor. With your more dominant hand, instruct the children to “come hither” and sit along the outside of your skirt.

Alas, I will not be going back to school this year.

I had a lot to organize besides my 19 pairs of jeans. My room was messy.

Listen, I’m not perfect, ok.

I can’t keep my room clean for more than a week. I’m not a dirty person. No, I do not have buckets of fried chicken expiring under the bed, and syrup sticking to my dresser, and Oreo crumbs in a trial that spells out my name, but I do have a rug of unfolded clothes covering the floor. It took me a while to clean my room that day. The reason this happens, I concluded, is because I come home from work, get undressed, and throw my clothes on the floor because I am too lazy to put them away or determine if the need to go in the hamper. Wow. I don’t think I ever used the word hamper in my life. Who am I, Kristen. Next thing I know I’ll be calling a couch a “sofa”!! AHHHHH.

Today is friday. The weekend starts for me in a few hours. I have big plans for the weekend. Big plans. Here is a picture I took of a bike today.

Goodbye.

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