A Life Realization


What is the meaning of life? What is my true calling? Why does the Starbucks barista fill my cup up to the rim with ice, when I order a LIGHT ICED Vanilla Lattee? If I’m going to pay $4.84 for a medium sized coffee, I want to take at least three gulps before it is gone. With ice, I’m done in two gulps.

I’ve been having realizations that the life I [we] lead is very precious and short…like a miniature chicken that drank iced vanilla lattes as a chick and therefore had its growth stunted. I used to think I was old when I was a senior in high school. Then I thought I was old when I was a senior in college. Now, as a working college graduate I think I am old; comparatively to my undergrad friends who still have to hand in homework. Homework? C’mon. How lame can we get?

I used to be able to count my groups of friends on one hand. Grammar school friends. High School friends. College Friends.

Now, I need to use two hands. Study Abroad Friends. Work Friends. Volunteer Friends. Writing Class Friends. Theodore Roosevelt School to Educate Bearded Orphans friends [TRSEBO].

To quote Jennifer Hudson’s solo number in Dreamgirls, “Look at me. I am changing.”

Last night I had a shocking realization that all humans are similar to one another. I was on the subway reading a woman’s text over her shoulder. She was sitting down, I was standing. The person she was texting said that they couldn’t meet up that night. “Can’t make it tonight.” The woman on the subway replied, “No worries!”. I read those two words and then looked at the ground appalled, as if I just saw a man lick the subway pole. Do you know how many times I’ve replied in a text, “No worries!” Only, I used even more exclamations. “No Worries!!!!!!!!”…and I added “at all”. “No Worries AT ALL!!!!!!!!” I can’t explain it, but seeing those words- and knowing I use the same phrase- made me feel like just another person. Another blip in the radar. Another book on the shelf. Another paper in the printer. Another sand granule on the beach. Another lantern on the steps*.

*This metaphor would only work if all residences were required to keep a lantern on their front steps.

Well, those are my thoughts of the day. Goodbye.

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3 thoughts on “A Life Realization

  1. I know how you feel about the “blip on the radar” situation. There are SO many people in this world and it’s easy to feel relatively insignificant. With all the attention we pay to celebrities it’s wierd to think that some of us may go through life somewhat unnoticed by mankind as a whole.

    With that said, I think you’re awesome! And the extra !!!! makes you different. =)

    xoxo

  2. I may be a blip in the radar or a just another book on the shelf. But I like to think that I’m not just another granule of sand… but maybe one of those clumps with seaweed around it.

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